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The Ren and Stimpy Show quotes

Ren: You fat bloated idiot! You worm! You... you stupid!

Ren: Look at you, man! You're a full-grown cat still watching cartoons! Why, you're three-years-old! Do you know what that is in human years?

Ren: (to Stimpy after many nights of not getting any sleep) Pss, hey Guido. Its all so clear to me now. I'm the keeper of the cheese... and you're the lemon merchant, you get it? And he KNOWS it. That's why he's gonna KILL US. So we got to beat it... ya... before he lets loose the marmosets on us! Don't worry little missy... I'LL SAVE YOU!

Mr. Noggin: You don't understand! Nobody understands! And so, I became a recluse, forever hidden and lonely. Spare the world my grotesqueness! Oh Lord! I put my pants on one leg at a time, too! Have you no heart?
Ren Hoek: You're right. I will mend my evil ways. Starting tomorrow!

Stimpy: Don't you know what today is, Ren? It's Tuesday the 17th, the unluckiest day of the year! You see, Ren, when the moon enters Libra, and the house of confluence shifts into retrograde, Virgo erupts, under pressure from Mercury. This causes the planets to align in a conga line of chaos and disaster!

Ren: Boy, Stimpy... we sure had fun today, didn't we? So long, kids! Come on, Stimpy, say goodbye.
Stimpy: Duh, where are we going?
Ren: (to Stimpy) The show's over. (to Audience) See you next time!
Stimpy: Next time? When's that?
Ren: Pretty soon. Don't worry.
Stimpy: Pretty soon? (getting choked up) How long is that?
Ren: In a little while, man!
Stimpy: (crying) A little while? What'll we do 'til then?
Ren: Why, you could shave your yak... or eat olive loaf!
Stimpy: Blecch! (resumes crying)
Ren: I know! You can keep yourself busy with this! (gives Stimpy a bag of Gritty Kitty Litter)
Stimpy: Oh, joy! (takes the bag and runs off-screen) (bag-tearing and litter-crunching noises are heard)
Ren: (getting pelted with clumps of litter) Eh... goodbye, folks!
Stimpy: Duh, goodbye, folks!

Stimpy: (Stimpy rapidly pokes at Ren's shoulder while he sleeps) Ren? Ren?
Ren: What EEZ IT, man?

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