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My Name Is Earl quotes

Randy Hickey: I bet he's had twenty beers today. That's how many I had when I tried to plug the television into that dog.

Earl Hickey: He's awake now so I threw him in the bath with a bar of soap.
Randy Hickey: What did he look like naked?
Earl Hickey: Kinda like ET when they found him by the river.
Randy Hickey: That poor little monkey, he just wanted to phone home.

Frank: Oh whatever, I'm the only person in the room who really knows you. I mean, who was there when your aunt what's-her-name died.
Billie: You mean my mom?
Frank: Yeah, her.

Earl Hickey: These hamburgers are great.
William: Thanks. It's Black Angus.
Randy Hickey: I don't think I can eat it now that I know the cow's name.

Earl Hickey: (looking for escaped prisoner) Okay look, we have 46 hours, Frank couldn't have gotten that far. Where's the ice cream store?
Randy Hickey: It's the one next to the train station and that costume store, near the bong shop where they make the fake IDs. We just have to look for a guy who could be dressed as anything and whose anywhere train might go.

Randy Hickey: You takin' Pops' hot dogs outta Camden County is like taking chicken out of Syracuse.
Earl Hickey: It's Buffalo, Randy.
Randy Hickey: No, I'm pretty sure it's chicken, Earl.
Joy Turner: Yeah, it's chicken. Hot chicken!

Earl Hickey: (voice over) This wasn't the first time a woman kicked me in the cherries and called me a rat but it was the first time I didn't mind.

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