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Modern Family quotes
Back in '68, when I was sweeping up hair in that barbershop, I had this mental picture of the family that, if I was lucky enough, I would end up with. Perfect wife, perfect kids... Well guess what? I didn't get any of that. I wound up with this sorry bunch. And I'm thankful for that every day. Well, most days.
I know what all of you are thinking: my jacket is wrinkled. I would have ironed it, but someone here thought it would be a great idea to use the iron to make a grilled cheese sandwich.
I had bread. I had cheese. I had an iron. What was I supposed to do?
I just thought you would be with Claire Pritchett.
You remember Claire?
Oh, yeah. I used to be so jealous of you.
You were jealous of me?
Sure. Claire Pritchett, with that blonde hair and those blue eyes, and that great smile... I can just picture her smiling right now.
I wonder who landed her? Lucky son of a bi***.
You know, the Native Americans believed that burning sage kept away the negative energy.
How'd that work our for 'em?
My trophy is a professional award given to me by my peers, while your trophy was given to you on a pier.
Hey Cam, does the gardener usually work on Saturdays?
I don't know, he comes when we need him - he's like Batman, but straight.
She's had the intellectual, she's had the romantic, why not both in one little brown package?
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