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Jonathan Creek quotes
(about Carla's Father) I just remember saying that I thought he was a bit of a pr***... ly sort of gentleman.
We went out for this wonderful meal, talked about everything. Then I took him back to my place. I literally offered myself on a plate to him that night... but, for whatever reason, he just made up an excuse and left... but, there you go, I suppose I just wasn't his type...
(dismissive) Hmm, suppose. Now, Charlotte, I just want to run over some facts about the case with you, would you mind.
I was just wondering what the technical term for that was - not so much "bigamy" as "bu****-me".
When this is all over I'm going to open a sweet shop. I've decided. With sour lemons.
So this is it, is it? Through the swirling fog of Victorian London a young girl is slashed to ribbons by Toad of Toad Hall!
Enough with the pedanticism and let us eat.
The word is pedantry.
(entering restaurant with Gary Lobo) I don't think I'll be spending the morning in a tank of boiling hot ink again in a hurry...
I feel like a poached octopus!
(at a table) Yeah, Personally I found her novels disturbing yet, er, compelling. When she writes, for example, of a mutant fetus that strangles a young girl with its umbilical cord. The metaphor is, er, obvious
yet to mine the vilest scenes of obscenity to get to the core of the human condition...
(cynically)... and making wads of money selling loads of tacky books didn't really come into it?
What the hell is this?
Your order madam - the poached octopus...
(spluttering) Poached oct-? Have you gone stark staring bonkers?
If there's been a mistake, my sincerest apologies. It's no problem, I'll have it returned and you can place another order.
No alright! Go on then. You might as well leave it now that it's here I suppose... (begins to tuck in)
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