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Selected lines and quotes from the tv show Everybody Loves Raymond. Check out our great collection of dialogues and quotes from the tv series Everybody Loves Raymond and search our website for thousands of other quotes on various topics from a great variety of authors, movies and tv shows.

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Everybody Loves Raymond quotes

Debra Barone: Only three more weeks huh?
Robert Barone: (depressed) Three more weeks.
Debra Barone: Oh come on try to say it like this. (happily) Three more weeks!
Robert Barone: Well when you put it like that it doesn't sound so bad. Here let me try. (mockingly) Bubonic plague!

Peter Macdougall: Nobody judges you on the floor of the bus station.

Debra Barone: How could you do that to me?
Ray Barone: Well, I just looked at what both candidates brought to the table, and I thought Bill Parker...
Debra Barone: Bill Parker? You hate Bill Parker!
Ray Barone: I hate Bill Parker the man, but I just thought that Bill Parker the candidate had an interesting platform
Debra Barone: Shut up! I'm your wife. I don't care if my platform was... anti-puppy. You have to vote for me.
Ray Barone: But doesn't it say in the Constitution...
Debra Barone: I don't care what it says in the Constitution! You vote for you your wife! And since you you know what it says in the Constitution?
Ray Barone: I'm not gonna stand here and let you badmouth America.

Ray Barone: You hear that?
Debra Barone: No, I don't hear anything.
Ray Barone: That's the sound of all our clothes being refolded.

Ally Barone: Daddy, what's an appointment?
Raymond "Ray" Barone: Well honey, an appointment is when two people decide to meet.
Debra Barone: Like going to the dentist.
Ally Barone: Oh.
Raymond "Ray" Barone: So, sleeping with me is like going to the dentist?
Debra Barone: Well, we both say the same things. "Sit back, relax, you won't feel a thing".

Marie Barone: You never even sent a gift
Alda: My gift was that I came at all
Marie Barone: What kind of a horse's as* gift is that?
Alda: You'd be lucky to have a horse's as*!

Robert Barone: I could of been a pretty good hockey player. I was big, I had the toughness, good hand-eye coordination.
Ray Barone: Yeah, but eventually you would've had to let go of the side.

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