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Take this. It's Uncle Howard's phone number in New York.
I've got an uncle in New York?
My cousin Ellen married his half-sister's nephew, before she got bit by that dog and died.
What you are doing in here?
(half naked) Feeling romantic...
Oh. What's for dinner?
Ohh, Howard! You really know how to sweep a girl back onto her feet.
Look, I like you, I really like you, but I gotta tell you, I have become seriously and emotionally involved with someone who isn't my aunt.
I forgive you, Brantley. (continues trying to seduce him)
All right, listen up. If there are any bugs in here, or rats, or anything that has more legs than I do, you just stay on your side of the room, okay? I'll stay on mine. I should warn you, I'm packing an iron.
Aunt Vera, listen, since the last time we met there's been a change.
Yes... nice suit, Brantley! (she starts undressing him; he tries to escape)
Agh! Ow! Look, what I mean to say is... Oh, Christ! I'm not free any more!
What, you're going to charge me? Oh ho, you're getting awfully cynical - does your mother know about this?
Ohh, no, I am not available.
Oh, good, you're not going to charge me.
Oh, God. What are you doing here?
Brantley, darling, I heard you calling me telepathically - I'm VERY psychic - so of COURSE I rushed right over.
I would've used the phone...
Mental telepathy's much more reliable.
Just tell me one more time what your solution is to this crisis.
We don't cut, we expand. (the waitress, Sheila, arrives)
I agree. Expansion is a positive reaction to the universe, while retraction, or cutting back, or pulling off, those are all negative forces. I used to be very negative, and then I took this personality workshop - my whole life turned around. Hiya, my name's Sheila. You make a good-looking couple - how long you been going together?
About 20 minutes.
Ohhhhh, first date, huh? Good luck.
No, we're business colleagues.
Colleagues, who needs that? You should go together. You look good together. - Oh, oh, d'you want to order?
Yeah, we need to see some menus, Sheila.
Menus! I'm sorry. - I'm studying to be an actress. I'm a much better actress than I am a waitress. Concentration, that's my big problem. I'll be right back.
Well, Sheila's in favor of expansion.
We should bring her to our next executive meeting. I think Art Thomas would like her a lot.
Sheila is also in favor of us seeing each other.
Yes, well, Sheila is clearly a nut.
(from across the room) I heard that! You should try to be more positive with your life, or you're gonna wind up miserable.
(hiding behind her hand) She heard me!
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