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The Santa Clause quotes

Charlie: These are Santa's reindeer, aren't they?
Scott Calvin: I hope not. These are... A gift. Probably from the cable company. We're getting the Disney Channel now. Merry Christmas.

Det. Nunzio: (after Scott got arrested) Look, I know you're Scott Calvin. You know you're Scott Calvin. So let's make this simple: I say 'name', you say 'Scott Calvin'. (gestures Scott to come close)
Det. Nunzio: Name?
Scott Calvin: Kris Kringle.
Det. Nunzio: Name?
Scott Calvin: Sinterklaas.
Det. Nunzio: (annoyed) Name!
Scott Calvin: Pere Noel. Babbo Natale. Pelznickel. (imitates Ed Sullivan)
Scott Calvin: Topo Gigio!
Det. Nunzio: Okay, Calvin, maybe a couple of hours in the tank will change your mind.

Bernard: The Santa Clause: In putting on the suit and entering the sleigh, the wearer waives any and all right to any previous identity, real or implied, and fully accepts the duties and responsibilities of Santa Claus, in perpetuity to which some time the wearer becomes unable to do so, by either accident or design.
Scott Calvin: What does that mean?
Bernard: It means: If you put on the suit, you're the big guy.
Scott Calvin: This is ridiculous! I didn't just put on the suit to -...
Bernard: Try to understand this!

Charlie: It's Santa! You killed him!
Scott: Did not! And he's not Santa!
Charlie: Well, he was...

Mr. Whittle: Good God, your weight! What happened?
Scott Calvin: Bee sting. Evidently I'm allergic. It almost killed me. But, the guy at the Emergency Room said that eventually the swelling will go down. I hope.

Scott Calvin: Yeah, well, look at my hair. It's turning grey.
Dr. Pete Novos: Oh, it's middle age, buddy. It happens. And with that body, you should be thankful you have hair. Look, if it bothers you, you can dye it - and you should diet!

Charlie: Whoa, Dad! You're flying!
Scott Calvin: It's okay, I'm used to it. I lived through the '60s.

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