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Lines and quotes from the movie The Longest Yard. Check out our collection of dialogues and quotes from the film The Longest Yard and search our website for thousands of other quotes on various topics from a great variety of authors, movies and tv shows.

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The Longest Yard quotes

Con Transvestite: What's wrong with you? Jealous because I don't cheer for you anymore?
Brucie: I don't know what you're talking about, Freak show!
Con Transvestite: Whatever, back freckles!

Guard Engleheart: Stop booing, people. Both teams are trying very hard.
Guard Dunham: What the hell's wrong with you? Stop acting like a da** cheerleader.
Guard Engleheart: Sportsmanship. Try it.

Cheeseburger Eddy: It ain't easy being cheesy!

Baby Face Bob: (after the game, to Chris Berman) Remember Chris, criminals are people too... (suddenly appears aggressive)
Baby Face Bob: Now give me your wallet!
Chris Berman: (Backs down a little and looks frightened)
Baby Face Bob: (laughs) Just kidding.

Guard Dunham: (after breaking off a long run, storms up to Megget) That's how a white man runs the football!
Earl Megget: Man, you lucky I ain't on defense. I'd crack you in that egg-as* head of yours!
Guard Dunham: Yeah, but you ain't on defense. Are ya, bi***?
Earl Megget: Switowski! Come here! (he comes running over)
Earl Megget: You know what he said in the library? (whispers to Switowski about Dunham calling Malcolm X then "N word", as Switowski's eyes about pop out of his head)
Earl Megget: Yes. Him. Out!
Switowski: (Destroys Dunham with a huge hit on the next play. Everyone gathers around to look at Dunham and sniffs) I think I made-ed him sh** himself.
Coach Nate Scarborough: I think he just sh** himself.
Stretcher Guy: Good lord, this guy sh** himself big time!
Switowski: (jumps up and down celebrating) See! I told you i made-ed him sh** himself!
Earl Megget: (as Dunmham is being carted off the field on a stretcher) I'll be sure to send them books to the hospital, pimp!
Deacon Moss: And some diapers!

Caretaker: (talking to crowd about the try outs) This is our chance to get a free shot at the guards!
Big Tony: And how are we going to do that?
Caretaker: Just show up at the tree-outs you big dumb bi***! (Everyone laughs)

Guard Engleheart: If you have to cry, it's okay. I'll cry with you.

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