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The First Wives Club quotes

Phoebe LaVelle: Hi, I'm Phoebe. I've seen all your movies and I want to be just like you. Only, me!

Morty: Shelly, what happened here? $140,00 for a PLATE? $47,000 for a carpet? A USED carpet? $300,00 for a Lamborghini? Are you crazy?
Shelly: I bought the car for you! It was only 300 grand! It was a GIFT!
Morty: With my money you bought it! I bought me the gift!
Shelly: Jesus, Morty, all I want is a lifestyle, y'know - with some ambiance and some classic eternal good taste!

Elise: It's the 90s, plastic surgery is like good grooming.

Chris Paradis: Mom I'm a lesbian. But don't tell Daddy! I want to wait for a good time; like Father's Day or Christmas Morning!

Brenda: What's wrong?
Jilted Lover: It's my lover. She left me for this younger woman that weighs twelve pounds.
Brenda: That's just like my Morty.
Jilted Lover: Who?
Brenda: Morty. (Shows Woman her picture)
Jilted Lover: She's butch.

Annie: Let's synchronize our watches.
Brenda: Ooo, just like "Mission: Impossible!"
Elise: Oh, that was a big hit.

Brenda: What's the matter, Morty? Can't you buy her a whole dress?

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