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The Client quotes

Mark: Thanks Rev. Roy, you've been a real pain in the as*.
Roy: Thank you, son. I can assure you, you have been an even larger pain in the as*.

Roy: Help me out here, Reggie. How far is it to that body?
Reggie: (leans forward and whispers) Twelve itty, bitty, tiny minutes.
Roy: (grins) Thank you, Reggie.
Reggie: You're welcome, Roy.

Reggie: I have been sober for three years.
Mark: Yeah right, that's what all the drunks say, how they're gonna get sober and all. They even say they love you but they don't. And then they come home wasted and beat on you and your mother so bad that you gotta hit 'em in the face with a baseball bat!
Reggie: You're talkin' about your daddy aren't you?
Mark: Yeah, well, I got rid of him. When me and my mom went into court to by our divource our lawyer SUCKED as usual, so I went up there and told the judge myself about all the beatin's, about how he made us sleep in the street. And that's when my father became my ex-father, and now I got you, and you're a drunk and a bad lawyer too! So now I'm gettin' rid of you, you're fired, okay?

Roy: You've been awful busy, Reggie, obstruction of justice, tampering with federal evidence, (pauses as he taps his pen on the table)
Roy: contributing to the delinquency of a minor, you've been REAL busy.
Reggie: Oh Roy, I am so FLATTERED that you noticed!

Dianne Sway: Alls I ever wanted was a white house with a walk-in closet.

Roy: Okay... what do you want?
Reggie: You have access to a private jet?
Roy: I do.
Reggie: Send it to Memphis, have it pick up Diane and Ricky Sway, bring them here. The whole family enters the Witness Protection program. Well, how are we doing so far?
Roy: (writing) Nothing I can't live with.
Reggie: The program sets them up with a fair income, and a nice little house. White, with a walk-in closet. (off Roy's look)
Reggie: Well, write it down. "Walk-in closet."
Roy: (sarcastic) Is "walk in" hyphenated?

Reggie: (upon seeing Mark's Led Zeppelin t-shirt) You like Led Zeppelin?
Mark: Yeah. Do YOU like Led Zeppelin?
Reggie: Oh, sure. They were a great band.
Reggie: I bet you've never even heard of Led Zeppelin. I bet you're just one of them grown ups who just pretends to like really cool bands just to get close to little punks like me.
Reggie: Well, I think we've covered just about everything...
Mark: Ok, what's you're favorite Led Zeppelin song?
Reggie: um... Moby di**, live version. bi*****' drum solo.

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