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Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa... stop right there. Eatin' a bi*** out, and givin' a bi*** a foot massage ain't even the same fu****' thing.
It's not. It's the same ballpark.
Ain't no fu****' ballpark neither. Now look, maybe your method of massage differs from mine, but, you know, touchin' his wife's feet, and stickin' your tongue in her Holiest of Holies, ain't the same fu****' ballpark, it ain't the same league, it ain't even the same fu****' sport. Look, foot massages don't mean sh**.
Have you ever given a foot massage?
(scoffs) Don't be tellin' me about foot massages. I'm the foot fu****' master.
Given a lot of 'em?
sh** yeah. I got my technique down and everything, I don't be ticklin' or nothin'.
Would you give a guy a foot massage? (Jules gives Vincent a long look, realizing he's been set up)
You give them a lot?
You know, I'm getting kinda tired. I could use a foot massage myself.
Man, you best back off, I'm gittin' a little pi**** here.
So, tell me again about the hashbars?
Okay, what you wanna know?
Hash is legal there in Amsterdam, right?
Yeah, it's legal, but it ain't a hundred percent legal. I mean, you can't just walk into a restaurant, roll a joint and start puffing away. You're only supposed to smoke in your home or certain designated places.
And those are hashbars?
Yeah. It breaks down like this: it's legal to buy it, it's legal to own it, and, if you're the proprietor of a hash bar, it's legal to sell it. It's still illegal to carry it around, but that doesn't really matter 'cause... get a load of this: if you get stopped by the cops in Amsterdam, it's illegal for them to search you. I mean, that's a right the cops in Amsterdam don't have.
(laughing) I'm going, that's all there is to it, I'm fu****' going.
Yeah baby, you'd dig it the most.
I'm not giving you that money. I'm buying something from you. Wanna know what I'm buyin' Ringo?
Your life. I'm givin' you that money so I don't have to kill your as*. You read the Bible?
There's a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon you." Now... I been sayin' that sh** for years. And if you ever heard it, that meant your as*. You'd be dead right now. I never gave much thought to what it meant. I just thought it was a cold-blooded thing to say to a mo********** before I popped a cap in his as*. But I saw some sh** this mornin' made me think twice. See, now I'm thinking: maybe it means you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. 9mm here... he's the shepherd protecting my righteous as* in the valley of darkness. Or it could mean you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. And I'd like that. But that sh** ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be the shepherd.
You guys look like... What do they look like, Jimmie?
Dorks. They look like a couple of dorks.
Ha-ha-ha. They're your clothes, mo**********.
The way it is now, you're taking the same risk as when you rob a bank. You take more of a risk, banks are easier. You don't even need a gun in a federal bank. I mean, they're insured, why should they give a fu**? I heard of this one guy, walks into a bank with a portable phone. He gives the phone to the teller, a guy on the other end of the line says, we've got this guy's little girl, if you don't give him all your money, we're gonna kill her.
Did it work?
fu*****-A right, it worked. That's what I'm saying. Knucklehead walks into a bank with a telephone! Not a pistol, not a shotgun, but a fu***** phone. Cleans the place out, doesn't even lift a fu***** finger.
Did they hurt the little girl?
I don't know, there probably never was a little girl in the first place. The point of the story isn't the little girl, the point of the story is, they robbed a bank with a telephone.
My name's Pitt, and your as* ain't talkin' your way outta this sh**.
Bring out the Gimp.
Well, I guess you're gonna have to go wake him up now, won't you?
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