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Lines and quotes from the movie Knocked Up. Check out our collection of dialogues and quotes from the film Knocked Up and search our website for thousands of other quotes on various topics from a great variety of authors, movies and tv shows.

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Knocked Up quotes

Pete: I'm gonna throw you in my DeLorean and gun it to 88.
Ben Stone: (Mimicks car noise) VRRROOOOM

Jonah: I can't believe you didn't fu***** wear a bag, WHO DOES THAT?
Jason: Why did we go to Costco and buy a year's supply of condoms if you weren't gonna use 'em, man?
Jonah: I can't believe you did this. You fu**** everything up.
Jason: The real point is not to get yourself into this position, that's what you have to realize. You gotta know all the tricks like, for example, if a woman's on top she can't get pregnant. It's just gravity.
Jonah: Well that's true. Everyone knows that.
Jason: What goes up must come down.

Ben Stone: I live in your phone!

Debbie: (on subject of husbands) You criticize them so much, they get down on themselves, and then they're forced to change!

Ben Stone: What time is it?
Alison Scott: 7:30
Ben Stone: Why the fu** are we awake? Let's go back to sleep.
Alison Scott: I have to go to work.
Ben Stone: Really?
Alison Scott: Uh, do you need to... get to work or anything?
Ben Stone: No, I'm uh... no work today hahahaha.

Ben's Dad: I love you. You're the best thing that ever happened to me.
Ben Stone: I'm the best thing that's ever happened to you?
Ben's Dad: Yes.
Ben Stone: Now I'm starting to feel a little sorry for YOU...

Alison Scott: I love your curly hair! It's great... do you use product or anything?
Ben Stone: No... I use, uh, jew it's called.

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