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Okay, it's the Super Bowl. You're a coach with a spotty career. You are down 31-0 at halftime and you need to motivate your team.
That wouldn't work in a movie.
You kidding me? It's in a movie every two years. (Ethan walks out of the bathroom)
(Ethan storms back into the bathroom) Come on guys! You, Allan, you're playing like a girl out there. What are you, a girl or something? You, Smith, what are you, a girl or something?
Okay, your wife calls. She wants a divorce.
The coach's wife?
Yes, the coach. The character you're playing.
Come on, guys. (Ethan picks up his phone)
Hold on a minute, guys. Hello? What? You're leaving me? No! I can't have this happening to me. My dad died, and now this.
You got any more pot?
Not for $9 an hour I don't... I mean, I don't know what you're talking about.
(rehearsing a monologue from The Godfather)
That was really good, especially the second paragraph about the killing.
Did you write that?
No, the mafia did.
(from trailer) (talking to a can full of his dad's ashes)
Dad... You were like a father to me.
I'm sorry I spat on your dog. I have no recollection of that.
I'm telling you. I wouldn't make it up.
You sure? I could've sworn I read it was man-made.
Nope. Not correct. Very old. Formed over time. Grand Canyon. Known fact.
Peter, I have a photogenic memory. I have recall for...
Ethan, I promise you. It's old. It's the Grand Canyon, it's not Hoover Dam.
Well, I know it's not the Hoover Dam, that was built by the Pilgrims.
I didn't sleep last night. I'm gonna try now.
Well you really should have masturbated, cuz I had a glorious or**** and I slept like a baby.
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