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Yeah. (Mitch and Ed go into the tent to check on Phil)
We were a little worried about you back there.
Ah. (Phil sits down on the stool, Ed and Mitch kneel down in front of him, as he holds the gun, looking down)
Why don't you give me the gun, Phil?
Ah, it's OK, I know how to handle a gun. (Phil begins to unload the gun by pushing the bullets out of the cylinder)
. You know being a store manager, you have to be there pretty early in the morning to receive the trucks. You have to be sure the, register totals, match the receiving records... and all the stock is put in the proper place, it's a very... responsible, job. (Mitch looks to Phil and watches as he unloads the gun nervously, Phil hands it to Mitch when it is completley unloaded, grinning nervously)
. Ah, CHRIST! (Phil begins to sob, and bury's his head on Mitch's shoulder)
(Mitch rubs and pats Phil's back) Hey Phil, come on Philly... It's OK man, it's not that bad...
(Phil's head is still in Mitch's shoulder) My life is over! I'm almost 40 years old, and I'm at the end of my life!
Phil, hey. (Mitch raises Phil up so he is looking at him)
You remember when we were kids, and we were playing ball, and we hit the ball over the fence out of bounds, and we yelled, DO OVER?
(grins, remembering) Yeah!
Your life is a do over. You've got a clean slate.
I got no place to live. And I'm gonna get wiped out in the divorce because I committed adultery. So, I may never see my kids again. I'm alone. How's that slate look now?
Value this time in your life kids, because this is the time in your life when you still have your choices, and it goes by so quickly. When you're a teenager you think you can do anything, and you do. Your twenties are a blur. Your thirties, you raise your family, you make a little money and you think to yourself, "What happened to my twenties?" Your forties, you grow a little pot belly you grow another chin. The music starts to get too loud and one of your old girlfriends from high school becomes a grandmother. Your fifties you have a minor surgery. You'll call it a procedure, but it's a surgery. Your sixties you have a major surgery, the music is still loud but it doesn't matter because you can't hear it anyway. Seventies, you and the wife retire to Fort Lauderdale, you start eating dinner at two, lunch around ten, breakfast the night before. And you spend most of your time wandering around malls looking for the ultimate in soft yogurt and muttering "how come the kids don't call?" By your eighties, you've had a major stroke, and you end up babbling to some Jamaican nurse who your wife can't stand but who you call mama. Any questions?
Do you know what the secret of life is? (holds up one finger)
One thing. Just one thing. You stick to that and the rest don't mean sh**.
But, what is the "one thing?"
(smiles) That's what *you* have to find out.
Whose idea was this anyway?
(later that night, at the dance) You're wrong, Ed, I'm telling you, it was not a stupid thing to say.
It WAS. She says, "thanks", and you say, "I'm married."?
Yeah! I don't want any... false flirtings.
Well, what if you're like me? What if you don't encourage them, and they still come after you?
It doesn't happen. See, women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.
(walking by) Good night! I'm going to bed.
(smiling widely at her) Good night! Sleep tight. (Bonnie smiles and waves)
(to Mitch) That was flirting.
No, that was... politeness. That was "have a pleasant and restful evening."
No, that was "I like your as*. Can I wear it as a hat?"
(Phil, Ed and Mitch have just arrived at the dude ranch, and are watching the cowboys rope and take down a steer. The cowboy jumps off the horse and grabs the horns of the steer, at the same time planting his heels in the dirt to try and stop the steer) My as* hurts, just watching this.
Alright Ed, your best day, what was it, twins in a trapeze, what?
No, I don't wanna play.
C'mon, we did it.
I don't feel like it.
Uh, okay. (pause)
I'm 14 and my mother and father are fighting again... y'know, because she caught him again. Caught him... This time the girl drove by the house to pick him up. And I finally realized, he wasn't just cheating on my mother, he was cheating us. So I told him, I said, "You're bad to us. We don't love you. I'll take care of my mother and my sister. We don't need you any more." And he made like he was gonna hit me, but I didn't budge. And he turned around and he left. He never bothered us again. Well, I took care of my mother and my sister from that day on. That's my best day.
What was you're worst day?
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