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Big Mommas House quotes

John: I used to be married, but not anymore.
Sadie: (sympathetically) Is your wife with Jesus now?
John: Actually, the guy's name was pronounced "Hey-soos." He was the gardner, and one day I caught him spreading some fertilizer around the bedroom, if you know what I mean.

John: I'm a married man, I'm not used to this much attention.

Big Momma: Somebody better tell me something, cause this show is some freaky sh**.

John: Is that morphine in there? God, beats the hell out of aspirin.

Malcolm Turner: Oooo ma da**!

John: (on the phone) Yeah, he knows what he's doing.
John: (faces Malcolm immediately afterwards) What the hell are you doing?

Sherry: (jumping into bed beside "Big Momma" during the storm) I remember how it used to storm like this when I was a little girl. You would wrap your arms around me, and it felt like nothing in the world could ever hurt me.
Malcolm Turner: (wrapping his arms around Sherry) It feels so da** good.
Sherry: (feeling a jab in her back from Malcolm's "arousal") Big Momma, what's that?
Malcolm Turner: (pulls out a flashlight) That's just my flashlight. The storm knocked out all the power so I had to get a big ol' flashlight.
Sherry: (interrupting the conversation they were having when she feels another jab in the back) Big Momma, is there another flashlight under there?

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